Trial Lawyer Turned Divorce Mediator

After many years of being a trial lawyer, why change roles and become a mediator? It is a fair question and while I cannot point to a sudden Damascus moment, I think it was the result of a lifetime of practicing divorce law and concluding our adversarial system fails a lot of clients. I still believe divorce litigation is necessary in certain cases, for example, a high worth case where one spouse has numerous businesses and is reluctant to provide supporting documentation. In those cases, court intervention and discovery, with the power of a court behind you, is often unavoidable.

But for most parties, it can be a huge waste of time and resources. In every litigated case I handled, at some point a judge would ask, sometimes plead, with the attorneys to go out in the corridor and discuss settlement. What is that but divorce mediation? I believe sensible parties should skip steps A to Y and go straight to Z. Mediation is a useful process for resolving the conflicts that attend most divorcing couples, and will assist the couples in working toward a mutually acceptable agreement. Why spend tens of thousands of dollars with expensive lawyers when you can achieve the same result with a single umpire, a divorce mediator? The benefits are obvious: keeping your money and not spending it on lawyers, and learning how to work through a process with a third party. Expense is a big factor. Instead of spending money on two lawyers filing motions, conducting legal research, and attending court conferences, depositions, etc., you incur the expense of a single attorney at an hourly rate. Perhaps most importantly, you can establish your own timeline and avoid months of desultory litigation. Mediation is quicker, and completed in a safe and secure environment. The attorney-mediator knows the law and, in my case, I know the local judges.

Parties are able to voice their issues in a place with no judgment being made about them. Typically, after a first free session, I listen to the parties present their cases from each side and allow each party an equal opportunity to discuss any and all issues that concern them. Judges simply do not have that kind of time. The first step lies with the parties. If they do not wish to continue fighting, and instead move to resolve their issues, mediation is the best solution.